Get Inspired, Be Empowered Forums Sexism & Patriarchy Divorce needs to be normalized- effective steps to remove stigma.

8 replies, 6 voices Last updated by Samriti Sharma 2 years ago
  • Woospire
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    Semantee Chattopadhyay
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    Divorce is as old as the institution of marriage itself. In ancient Egypt not only was divorce allowed but a person could divorce their spouse on any grounds, without any interference from the state. Among the ancient Romans, any person could divorce by simply sending a letter to their partner, or even by declaring that the marriage was over in front of witnesses. But these liberal attitudes towards divorce, changed with the advent of organised religions. After Christianity became the official religion of Romans in 380 C.E., divorce was strongly opposed by the church. The only proper way to end a marriage was annulment- a declaration by church officials to dissolve a marriage in exceptional cases. Hinduism views marriage as a vow to stay together for not just one life, but eternity, by Dharma. Islam includes various provisions for divorce under religious law, but still views divorce as an ‘evil’ that must be avoided. Why most religions were so strongly opposed to divorce, is unclear. Some theorists argue that it has to do with the fact that religions prioritise institutional signs over the well-being of individuals. In the 18th century, with the American and French revolutions, secularism was on the rise and the west source separation between the state and the church. There was a shift from religious laws to secular laws, that centre individual wellbeing and freedom. However, when the first divorce laws were introduced, the divorce rates were so low that in 1857 only 324 cases of divorce were filed in all of Britain. It was only with the rise in industrialisation and a change in family structures and gender roles, that the force became more common in the late 19th and early 20th centuries. Divorce rates begin to rise globally around the late 20th century yer India’s rates have remained at a mere 1%. It is useless to consider India as the land of eternal love. Less than 20% of Indian women in the paid workforce, one of the lowest rates of female labour force participation in the world. This makes them financially dependent on their husbands, and therefore less able to live a bad marriage. The conservative nature of our society adds fuel to the fire. In India, keeping the family unit together is an important determinant of social status. Divorce becomes an individualistic act of aberration in such a framework. The stigma of getting a divorce is so high, that many times people in unhappy marriages used to stay apart rather than getting divorced. The number of people separated in India is thrice the number of people divorced. The stigma of the ‘divorcee’ tag impacts women much more than men, with Indian men being twice as likely to remarry after a divorce. Being able to stick by one person and love them through life, may be the right choice for some people. But for others, it may not be so. Whether it’s a choice to fever once mental and physical well-being over an institution, or it’s simply to seek happiness and fulfilment elsewhere, we need to destigmatized this very mundane choice, to end a partnership, and just move on with our life.

    Manpreet Singh
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    Divorce remains one of the most controversial topics in Indian society. This is complicated by the existing stigmas. Marriages must not mean to stay together until death. It is always a better option to end a troubling relationship. Let us normalize divorce and always cease blaming women. India appears like divorced ladies as selfish as a traditional nation. That’s not everything. They are also viewed as a “social menace.” The decision to walk away from marriage is not favorably recognized because patriarchy does not allow women to live alone. They are regarded as ‘the property of their spouse’ and should adapt in spite of all their problems. How can we picture her walking away from it in a culture where marriage is seen to be the final destination of a woman?
    Divorces are especially stigmatized since the children appear to be affected. Well, it is more harmful to realize that your relatives are in an unhappy marriage. Children need a healthy environment at home to ensure a normal upbringing. Only if the parents have a good connection is this possible. Their absence has a harmful impact on children. Instead of avoiding and persisting in a marriage that does not function, we should normalize divorce. Women are afraid that they may file a divorce because they will be labeled “home wreckers.” In 2017, the Indian divorce rate was as low as 1%, according to a report by the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development. It was not that marriage functioned properly, but that women in marriage were never reported to have had emotional, physical, and mental abuse. Women who are courageous enough to leave hazardous marriages should be appreciated and not humiliated. Many women are afraid of doing what they have done: refusing to crap others. Women remain in abusive marriages because they are trained to “adapt and accept” whatever. In addition, a married woman is viewed as the “duty” of her husband. Once she gets divorced, she has nobody to “look after” her on her own. It is also uncertain whether she will get married again. In the end, society finds that its life is being damaged. Those stigmas are barriers to the way a woman breaks away from unhealthy relationships. His time to stop the stigma about divorce and enable women to speak up and choose correctly.

    Yash Tiwari
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    The nature of divorce has changed dramatically in modern societies. Today, many countries have put procedures and rules in place for handling the splitting of assets, child custody, and the enforcement of support agreements. In liberal democracies regulation of marriage is a matter generally for the state, not religious institutions or families. Yet official statistics from many European countries show that the majority of people who marry do not stay married or end up living together. In England, only 51 percent of adults are currently married. Today, any marriage can be dissolved, legally, if the husband and wife are no longer living together. In many countries, the partners must agree on the conditions of the separation or divorce. Otherwise, a court will decide how to divide their property, debts, and responsibilities toward their children.

    Marriage today has lost some of its transcendent purity and become just another contract. As a legal arrangement it is far more complicated than it was in the past, with court-supervised, ‘no fault’ divorce at one extreme and marriage contracts at the other. Divorce rates are on the rise in India while more and more people are working to end the stigma associated. They blame women to be selfish when they file for divorce. The divorce laws only provide for men but not for women. Covering approximately 1,237,263,889 people, India is the seventh-largest country by population in the world. In a country that large, relationships will sometimes end or significantly degrade, and thus there exists a need to have divorce available. Today, the country prides itself on diversity making relationships richer but it also makes them difficult when they end. Despite having had divorces for many years now, it has always been seen as something negative.

    Divorce is not a luxury but a right. It does have a positive correlation with most of the developed countries in terms of crime/suicides, divorce, mental health issues, domestic violence, and so on. And by the society, if it continues to consider that at least one-third of its married men are experiencing dissatisfaction with their marital status; and if women are being restricted from being in touch with their inner selves and individuality. Harsher terms such as ‘desertion,’ ‘jilt,’ etc. are used to describe the act of leaving your partner. The skewed perspective can be related to the background where divorce is considered a guilty act and a sign of being immoral. Although legally accepted, divorce has yet to be socially accepted in India which remains a complex issue that needs to flourish in order to promote feminism. Divorce rights have been given by the government but divorce practices are still constrained by traditional norms and values of Indian culture.

    The only way we are going to solve this problem is if we start talking about it more openly, ‘normalize’ divorce, take the stigma away from it. Only then will society realize that they need to support a woman who decides to end her relationship and empower her to do so without being judged. From the perspective of society, a divorce can be defined as a woman leaving a bad husband. But at the same time, it is also recognized that women have some important life experiences. It can go through the post-divorce period well. In a way, divorce can improve women’s lives and become more successful in later than before divorce.

    PALAK KASHIV
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    A woman enters into a new phase of her life by giving a birth to little baby her motherhood glorification began. Once the mother is being she can never leave her motherhood journey it is an important commitment of her life. A mother is always responsible for her children and she always wants to give her best for the children, a child always looks up to her mother’s behavior when he/she. mother is always the safe place for children. Mother is always a selfless person when it comes to their child, she is ready to do anything for her child also to make her smile that is what we call glorification of motherhood. patriarchy always tells women to keep her career on hold and look after the children because they want your presence at the home. Even some husbands also tell that but what if women want both career and child at the same time why we have to choose between because both play a valuable role in her life. But I am so proud of mothers who is managing career and children well. So, it is possible to even in the future children are going to do the same with their children. Women should motherhood perceptions need to change it is not that motherhood is not perfect. A mother can ask the father to take care of the child and needs the mother to give unconditional love. Being the best a mother. Mother needs to give her child good teaching and make her own. All mother needs to be respected and also take care.

    PALAK KASHIV
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    Divorce is the most unaccepted and controversial thing in our country even today, it also considered that if a woman first files divorce then it is considered more serious and a lot of questions are raised about her character and behavior by society people spread rumors about her and tries to blame, if two people are not satisfied we each other and the arguments are converting in to fight, and not being happy with each other its normal to take divorce also if women or men cheating on each other then how much will they sought out the things at end of they have to face each other’s face. Society needs to remove this stigma that divorce means the end it is just accepting that couple are not made for each other and by legally separating one can live their life free from responsibilities of each other or they can find someone else things will lot different with them maybe this is something new for the society but this how it should be and accepting change, and by not allowing to take divorce we will just see two broke people together at end of the happiness is matter the most and what is wrong in taking custody or giving what women are claiming compensation if the partner is not agreed to give that then he should have work on their relationship and try to save it. Please remove stigma divorced women are not allowed stay at her parent house they are a burden on them, it was her house by birth she has all the right to stay at her home, after facing divorce she is already going through tough times, what family members and society instead of supporting we are making more difficult for her. People should not interfere in the matter of married couples and respect their choices and decision without judging them.

    Manpreet Singh
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    Divorce remains one of Indigenous society’s most controversial themes of debate. This is compounded by the existing stigmata. Marriages mustn’t mean to stay together until death. It is always a better option to end a troubling relationship. Let us standardize divorce and every time stop blaming women. India appears like divorced ladies as selfish as a traditional nation. That’s not everything. They are also regarded as a “social menace.” The choice to divorce marriage is not favorably recognized because patriarchy does not allow women to live independently. You are seen as ‘the property of your husband’ and should be adapted.
    Divorce is also stigmatized as it appears to impact kids. Well, it is more hazardous to realize that your parents are unhappily married. Children need a healthy family environment in order to be educated properly. Only if the parents have a good connection is this possible. His absence has a bad impact on the children. Instead of avoiding and living in matrimony that does not function, we should normalize divorce. Women fear divorce because they’re labeled ‘homewreckers.’ Women fear divorce. In 2017, the divorce rate of India was less than 1%, according to a report from the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development. The number of divorces has grown from 1 in 1000 to 13 in 1000 in India over the last 10 years. We still have the lowest divorce rate, however. Arranged marriages occur in India between two families and not individuals (who barely know each other). A request for divorce would be considered contrary to a parent decision and yes, Indian parents are never incorrect. Women who are bold enough to get away from unhealthy marriage should be praised and not humiliated. They have done what many women fear: they refused to make others poo. Women remain in abusive marriages because they are instructed to “adapt and accept” regardless.

    Samriti Sharma
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    Very rightly stated Divorce is the most prevalent stigma in India since time immemorial. Indian society are conservative in nature where Marriage as a sacrament implies a permanent and indissoluble union. It was considered a union not only for this life but for the lives to come. Among Hindus marriage is a necessary sanskar, every Hindu must marry as man is incomplete without his wife and it is wife who completes him. This was and at present too is the mindset of our Indian society in particular.
    However, the need of the hour is to normalise Divorse apart from all these theories. It should be recognised here that parties have same freedom of divorce as they have of marriage. As per Family Law in India there are 3 theories of Divorce which includes:-
    1. Fault Theory of Divorce, which is also known bas the guilt theory and which lays down that the party seeking divorce must be an innocent party, which means that Divorce shall only be filed in case one party has committed matrimonial offence against another.
    2. consent theory of divorce States that if marrige is a contract based on mutual consent of parties, the marriage should be dissoluble by such mutual consent of the parties too. It is recognised many countries which include Belgium, Sweden, Japan, Portugal United States and United Kingdom etc.
    2.Breakdown Theory of Divorce was propounded because both the fault theory and the consent theory had failed to provide adequate relief to the parties.
    Here, in all the theories above mentioned provided women with an option to end their marriage at their own will subject to certain conditions. The courts had opined in many cases that purpose of Divorce Law was not to punish the guilty spouse but to protect the innocent one.
    Divorce was given a fair recognition in Law but it somehow failed to gather acceptance in society as the women who filed for Divorce or took a decision of seperation from their current relationship were looked upon by the society, considered mean and selfish.
    I fail to understand here why women are always expected to tolerate all the abuse, misbehaviour and why she can’t step out of the institution of marriage. Why is our society always eager to judge and never up to understand what these women go through? Why we can’t just accept it all and support our daughters and sisters who take such decisions?
    Change begins from home and in the Modern Era today there is no space for such stigma which not only bounds the person freedom and will of a women but also restrict the growth of the society and the nation as a whole.
    Modernization is not only a lifestyle but a growth of new and innovative mindset too.

    Samriti Sharma
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    @samriti
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    Very rightly stated Divorce is the most prevalent stigma in India since time immemorial. Indian society are conservative in nature where Marriage as a sacrament implies a permanent and indissoluble union. It was considered a union not only for this life but for the lives to come. Among Hindus marriage is a necessary sanskar, every Hindu must marry as man is incomplete without his wife and it is wife who completes him. This was and at present too is the mindset of our Indian society in particular.
    However, the need of the hour is to normalise Divorse apart from all these theories. It should be recognised here that parties have same freedom of divorce as they have of marriage. As per Family Law in India there are 3 theories of Divorce which includes:-
    1. Fault Theory of Divorce, which is also known bas the guilt theory and which lays down that the party seeking divorce must be an innocent party, which means that Divorce shall only be filed in case one party has committed matrimonial offence against another.
    2. consent theory of divorce States that if marrige is a contract based on mutual consent of parties, the marriage should be dissoluble by such mutual consent of the parties too. It is recognised many countries which include Belgium, Sweden, Japan, Portugal United States and United Kingdom etc.
    2.Breakdown Theory of Divorce was propounded because both the fault theory and the consent theory had failed to provide adequate relief to the parties.
    Here, in all the theories above mentioned provided women with an option to end their marriage at their own will subject to certain conditions. The courts had opined in many cases that purpose of Divorce Law was not to punish the guilty spouse but to protect the innocent one.
    Divorce was given a fair recognition in Law but it somehow failed to gather acceptance in society as the women who filed for Divorce or took a decision of seperation from their current relationship were looked upon by the society, considered mean and selfish.
    I fail to understand here why women are always expected to tolerate all the abuse, misbehaviour and why she can’t step out of the institution of marriage. Why is our society always eager to judge and never up to understand what these women go through? Why we can’t just accept it all and support our daughters and sisters who take such decisions?
    Change begins from home and in the Modern Era today there is no space for such stigma which not only bounds the person freedom and will of a women but also restrict the growth of the society and the nation as a whole.
    Modernization is not only a lifestyle but a growth of new and innovative mindset too. Women today don’t need men to be recognised and are capable enough of living their life as they want to without any aid from men. We as society should not limit or curb their sucess but instead should encourage them to step forward and lead a reputed life in their own.

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