Why are women expected to be compromising more in a marriage rather than boys?
Marriages are unions or bonds between two people that are recognized or accepted officially, not only in the legal context, but also socially. When married, a couple has to take a set of oaths, no matter which religion it follows. The oaths suggest the purity of the bond and promises made by both the people, in order to support each other and be there for each other always. Nowhere in the oaths, or chants or promises is it mentioned that either of the too has to compromise more than the other. Although, in our society, it is quite prominent how women have to compromise in a marriage as compared to men.
The first step towards compromising starts before a marriage when the woman is expected to be all that the groom’s family might desire as a bride. Women at times have to give up their careers because their spouse’s family does not want them to work. Independent women change themselves into dependent women who have to ask their husbands before doing anything in life. From what they wear to what they do, everything is expected to be controlled by the man. Why is patriarchy so cruel? Why do we have to abide by rules that are doing no good to the society and are not even written down anywhere?
Women have to fight for their own rights that they were never granted. In certain religions, the society had allowed for the man to divorce his wife and leave her stranded with a number of children and no source of income to look after them. Men have also been permitted polygamy, whereas women are not even supposed to look at any man other than her husband, otherwise she can be declared ‘characterless’ by the society. Why does the society expect only women to give up their lives to look after their children? The children belong to their father as much as they belong to their mother right? Then why don’t their fathers look after them the same way their mothers do and why can’t their mothers work and earn for a living the same way their fathers do? This is only and only because of the narrow minded thinking and thoughts that the society has. It can only further narrow down the path for women in their life. It’s high time we understood men are not superior to women. Therefore, there should be equal compromises from both sides in a marriage.
A woman myself,
Shubhangini Shaktawat