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When it is said that one in three women face sexual harassment or assault once in their lives, I think it is an understatement. From my experience and all other experiences that I’ve heard, all women have gone through at least one form of abuse, whether it be physical or sexual.
When men claim that they’ve never promoted rape culture, they just don’t know what rape culture means. Brushing hands over a girl’s hands or other body parts intentionally, catcalling or passing lewd comments as a girl walks by, locker room chat groups and talks that objectify random girls and put them in danger because who knows when they might act on their wishes, groping the breasts or butt while in a crowded place, or if the guy is bold enough, in a less crowded space, grinding against them in buses and ultimately rape.
If people don’t understand that the first few actions mentioned lead to the final and drastic act of intrusion against a person, they are either ignorant or is someone who perpetrates rape culture as something that is normal and part of a growing boy’s life.
When eve-teasing is normalized as just fun play among friends, even if the victim feels uncomfortable, that is promoting rape culture. It all comes under sexual harassment.
By now, I suppose it is established that assault and rape is a men’s issue. It is due to endless misogyny that is fed into them since childhood. It has everything to do with establishing superiority over the other gender because women are seen as weaker and unable to retaliate. The power play is also a factor when it comes to little boys being assaulted – also by men. Dominance over the weaker ones; women, kids, disabled people, or old people, men love being in control. Wanting more authority is made to be a normal trait in men because it is good to be ambitious, right? If it’s a man, of course! God forbid a woman is ambitious, that too, in India. 🙂
When perverts or angry men abuse people, I emphasize that it all depends on overpowering someone. It is not the act alone that gives him satisfaction, it is the sense of ecstasy he receives from exerting his ‘manliness’ that makes him exercise it again.
Little girls are abused because they are innocent and teens because they are going through puberty so they’re old enough to know what’s happening. A girlfriend is abused because the boyfriend is controlling and possessive and causes harm if she doesn’t do what he wants. Married women come under an entirely different category because they are legally bound to the man under the name of ‘wife’ and hence cannot do anything to defend themselves under the law. Domestic abuse is permitted ‘to keep the wife from overstepping her boundaries’ and marital rape is allowed because she is entitled to satisfy her husband’s needs. In today’s world, men don’t even bother with the age before they rape, even newborn babies to old ladies are raped because they are weak and helpless. Then comes another category, necrophiliacs; the people who don’t let women rest in peace even after they’re dead.
The recent incident of the man stabbing his wife to death because she was a) assumed to be having an affair and b) going to work even when he was against it. He kept stabbing her over 25 times even after she was dead because of his entitled pent-up rage. His misogyny and patriarchy authorizing him to stab his wife to death in the middle of the road in the presence of over 10 people, who did nothing to stop the violent man. Instead, they took videos to upload on social media.
This brings us to the next problem that enables men to attack and assault women whenever they want. Trauma porn. It is the exploitive sharing of the darkest, creepiest, most jarring parts of our trauma specifically for the purpose of shocking others. It causes shock and fascination for some, while it triggers PTSD in some survivors of the same.
When news media share violent videos without trigger warnings, it gives them the reach they so desperately need, but also brings back the trauma that some people have been through. Additionally, when people watch these increasingly widely available gory videos, they get desensitized to the blood and gore that they see. When an image of a burned person is already etched into your mind, the next time you see another similar picture, it doesn’t affect you. This is your brain getting used to it. This makes an opportunity for men to act on their sadistic desires. Ultimately increasing the number of atrocities committed against women, kids, and animals.
In consequence of the powerful only preying on the weak.