2 years, 1 month ago-
Although there is no doubt that the institution of marriage has grown leaps and bounds in the last few decades or so, the benefits have been limited to the ultra-urban areas where even the concept of live-in relationships has found a place. The modernization of marriage or the equality factor has yet to be a trickle down to the lower or rural parts of the society.
The urban and rural areas have different problems regarding equality in marriage. In urban settings, the girls still face the pressure of getting married within a certain age frame and bearing children because of a false notion that they cannot bear child after the age of 30 years. Even in the professional setup, they don’t get that many maternity and marriage-related benefits that they deserve, hence they have to make compromises with their lives.
In rural areas, the situation has not changed much and it can be compared to the past. The women are heavily dependant on their husbands for quite literally everything and they have no saying power. Equality does not really exist in the rural setup. If a woman is facing a very toxic marriage, then she has no other choice than to tolerate it for the rest of their lives.
The concept of divorce is also not that mainstream because the kind of problems that omen face after getting a divorce are unsurmountable.
So to make them have an equal stake in the marriage, we must make them more educated and independent. We have to get rid of the ancient notions like a wife is an ardhangini of her husband.Talking about the earlier times, marriages have always been considered a sin to the women, where it was all a burden of responsibilities to the women, indirectly it was meant to babysit grown men, endure the tortures, and do everything for everyone’s happiness but their own. By the time changed, most women are now evolved to live a life on their own, the meaning of marriage has now somewhere changed to equality where both men and women are bound to be equally responsible of whatever decisions they make, whatever they do, marriages are now something where there’s a couple’s choice to live it whatever way they like, with the consent of both the spouses equally. But, far away from the people managing to work on marriages equally, with equality, there are still some people with minute mindset still considering women to be the one carrying more responsibilities, and doing what suits her families the best. There are still loopholes, when we talk about marriages, but there exists change somewhere which can eventually lead to more change. But the change that exists today in terms of equality is because of the education and people’s willingness to see a better world with equality.
From the day when the practice of marriage began, there is no equal rights in marriages. The one adjusting to the situation and taking burden on head is the girl. She is forced to leave her parents, she is given all the house chores and she takes up the duty to look after the children leaving all her passion and profession back. She is being demanding with her skin colour, body shape, dressing and dowry. She is expected to follow all these to be a responsible wife, daughter-in-law and mother respectively. But with no efforts, only by working on his usual routine the role of a man is praised as responsible gentleman. Where do we see equality here? But also the development of this society paves way for these women to succeed on both their passion-profession life and the home-maker life. I am also happy that quarter of the women number select this way. But some women lag behind hanging with the permission of her family and society. Technically speaking equality is to be taken and not to expected, but some women do not realize this.
No, not at all there is no equality in marriages. Women’s are still not provided equal rights.
Equality in marriage means that both partner’s interest and wishes are respected by each other. They support ecah other.There shouldn’t be one dominating the other.
But as a bitter truth of society there is no equality in marriages which results in bad marriage and less understanding between the couple. Why women has to put sindoor and wear mangalsutra after wedding? Why girl has to left her house and go to boy’s house? Just to show that she is married and now she has a different lifestyle according to her in laws. Who is going to take care of girl’s parents after her marriage? At the time of oldage she can’t even help them financially because in the eyes of society it’s crime. Why the couple can’t take the shared responsibility of both parents ( girls as well as boys)? Why she is asked if she work after marriage or not? Does anybody asks the same question to boy? Why everybody is having all expectations from girls? Why in laws wish to have a boy from her pregnant daughter in law? Just because girl is a liability and boy is an asset.This all thing led to unsuccessful marriage which results in divorce or being alone.
To have equality in marriages there should be teamwork. Men should help women in household chores. They both can work together to make work easier. Both should give time to their children’s education. It shouldn’t come on women shoulder alone. It’s high time now women need equality in marriages.No, there is not equality in marriages. Women are forced to do more household chores then being outside and chilling. Parents say that she is praya dhan. It’s not her house. Her house will be that to whomsoever she get married. Why? She has an individuality and she need to be equally treated by the society.
Equality in marriage ?
“Hey she is your husband listen to him ”
“Hey did you have dinner before your husband”
These are few comments which women have to listen and to follow .A woman has never got equality in marriage . EQUALITY mean paying respect to each other in a relationship . In earlier times, women were not even asked whether they had to get married or not . And even after marriage, they were always given below status from husband, they did not have the right to eat before husband, they did not have the right to go anywhere without their insistence. After marriage, a woman has to leave her house, but why should a woman always leave her house ? And if ever a man decides that he will stay at his wife’s house, then society starts laughing at him. After marriage, the wife cannot wear the clothes of her choice that she likes . She needs the permission of the husband for everything.
This is all about the ancient period so let’s talk about the modern era . Now all is independent, she can take her own decision. But the decision to marry is not in his hands right now, even today people follow the old customs, due to which a woman cannot marry the person he loves, yes if he is well set and belongs to their cast . Even today, women have to leave their jobs after marriage, why not a man is asked to stay at home leave his job and career , why should a woman be expected to sit at home after marriage and handle children? Many men beat their wives and torture them. But then this society does not raise any voice against him , rather they says that he is her husband, it’s his right . After marriage, a woman is not even asked whether she wants to become a mother or not, whether she want to bear the responsibility of the child or not . The woman who do job, gets up early in the morning, prepares food for everyone, sends the children to school and husband to the office, and then she goes to work and make arrangements for the lunch and then in evening when is come back home do the other work and prepare food by her own . Both man and the woman go to work, but why only a woman cook food do other work and the man just comes and rest ?
Both of them need rest, if they come home and work together, then work will be quick, both will also get a chance to rest. If before marriage and once after marriage the woman is asked that she is happy with the marriage. Is she really wanted to get married or not . Just a little thing brings you a quality in a married bond .Every Indian girl after reaching a certain age has been asked when does she want to get married. Marriage is an institution that is deeply rooted in our culture. Be it India or the west historians have agreed that marriage was never based on love, instead, it was based on the transfer of land, property, money etcetera. Till today, many women have to change their surnames after marriage. The basis of marriage is far away from equality. Equality in a relationship means that each person’s interests and desires are respected. Inequality in a relationship refers to in balance of power between partners.
Although society has progressed, gender stereotypes still prevail. When one partner holds on to the traditional perspective and the other one doesn’t they have a hard time progressing in the marriage. In the case of traditional marriages, it is a mutual understanding that the husband is dominant. In India, the traditional style of marriage still prevails. A woman is expected to take care of her kids, her husband, her house and her family without complaining.
Marriage is a special part of every women’s life. But not every marriage is successful or I must say satisfactory. because of inequalities faced by women. According to recent data, about 0.25% of total marriages are divorced .the divorce rate is much less than in other countries such as the U.S.A. and other European countries.
Since ancient times Indian societies were gripped with strong norms of having strong and successful marriages and sometimes marriage was also even compared with idols. We also find that in ancient Indian societies there are more arranged marriages than love marriages. but due to the prevalence of western society and the spread of education now young people are preferring love marriages are more suitable. are these marriages working?
The basic factor which causes divorce in India is inequalities. As societies are getting advanced they are well aware of their rights and if they are not satisfied they quiet. If we look into rural society we will find that women are considered a pet of their husband. She has to obey him and if not he will beath her and sometimes this heinous crime leads to the death of the bride.
Generally, these women are either illiterate or do not have any support from their parent’s side.
Although today our constitution and some landmarked judgment have given right to marriage women against violence. Inequalities and small mind thinkings which are still prevailing in the society such as wife should not take her own decision always have husband views. She has to never say no to physical relations with her husband even if she says not will to have it.
But our society is trying its best to educate girls telling about their rights and helping them. Hope we will see more changes and make our society an illusion.Before, the divorce rates were less and almost non existent. That is due to the fact that divorces were frowned upon then. Now, the rates are higher because divorce is legal. The reasons for divorce are infidelity, rape, abuse etc.
Marriages have improved and become more modern nowadays. But, some marriages still aren’t equal.
The bride usually has to leave her house after marriage. The same isn’t considered for the groom.
Women often have to bid goodbye to their careers after getting married because they have to stay at home and take care of their family.
They have to obey their husband and not talk back to him.
Some husbands think that they own their wife and think they can do whatever they want. Luckily, some of them do not tolerate this type
of behavior.
The rates of marital rape and abuse rise because many don’t take it seriously and do nothing. If people changed their attitudes, the divorce rates would go down.
If couples think of each other as equals, marriage would be so much easier.
Nowadays, the condition is getting better. Many people get out of abusive marriages and many couples have modern roles (ie: man staying at home to take care of the house and woman working). So I hope that one day gender equality will be achieved.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.